Vexing problems surrounding internet routing table.

Today, noted Internet hall of famer, Dallas McStingray in his keynote address to the Learned Society of Header Collectors, laid out a confronting vision of the future for routing - computers are coming. As McStingray valiantly explained to his audibly skeptical audience, soon, everyone will have access to powerful computers - even small children will have computers that can fit in their tiny, ooze coated hands. We will live in a future where flying computers in drones can stream 4K videos in real time, and grade schoolers will train machine learning models on USB accelerator boards that can perform several teraflops per second with less than 5W of power....

April 11, 2022 · 2 min · P.B. Palasade

Internet expert articulates thoughts on hardware platforms.

In a flurry of succinct, anger fueled posts to popular facebook group “Net-Talk”, newcomer - and by his own assertion - internetworking expert Leofstan Eowald furiously and repeatedly broadcast that “anything not enterprise grade is clearly a crap toy”. His rage only rivaled by his clear expertise in topics such as fine linen pants as well as running Cisco ASR100 series routers, he ardently asserted that “anything less than enterprise grade hardware is full of bugs” and that “an ASR100X with unlimited license can be purchased on ebay for $2000”....

March 20, 2022 · 2 min · M.P. Labelspace

EXCLUSIVE: Global backbone now available in your area.

ALBERTA, CA, 2022-03-06 In shocking news that rattled the very foundations of internet transit availability, it was revealed in an unsolicited email to an ardent supporter of JFI that a major international transit provider does, in fact, have a new account manager covering his area. This exclusive, brought the attention of the JFI news desk just moments ago, was handed JFI for immediate reporting by professional network engineer and [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extreme_ironing](extreme ironing) amateur Gosto Oliveira....

March 6, 2022 · 2 min · M. P. Labelspace

BREAKING: Popular forum moderator deletes unfunny post.

POPULAR INTERNET FORUM 2022-02-20 Expert level forum operator “NegEngTuff” whose real name is unknown, but based on his internet persona is in fact a real life professional fighter, a street tough with extensive networking experience and a comedic genius the likes of the venerable Yakov Smirnoff. The self proclaimed “FMIE #0001” [Editor’s Note: FMIE is a lesser known certification journey which can mean either (or both) Forum Moderator Internetworking Expert, also possibly “FITE Me IRL Expert”] expressed his extreme displeasure by “permabanning” fledgling satirist for making a “low level, unfunny post” on popular forum /r/NetworkingChuckleHut....

February 20, 2022 · 2 min · MAC Twain

Bleeding edge tech solves data center woes.

BUMBLESTUMP MISSOURI MAC Twain A local company celebrated the 7th anniversary of joining two critical data centers with its IT staff this week. For 7 years, the data centers have been connected using a bleeding edge technique their consultation firm calls “Distended VLANs” which allows communication between applications at each site. Getting there wasn’t easy. Veteran network engineer Treyce Rowt had slight reservations when the company first discussed the idea. “They are out of their f******* mind....

February 14, 2022 · 3 min · MAC Twain